Alone # Lonely

I want to do many things alone, which causes me to experience loneliness sometimes. Alone is somehow different from lonely but being alone for long time can lead to solitary (solitary is regarded as similar meaning as lonely).

I see so many expats coming to Vietnam to work and live alone. I do think if they feel lonely because even I, an introvert who prefers to spend more time alone than being surrounded by the crowd, I don't ensure I can settle down in another country without bringing one of my relatives along. It is such a brave effort that I have ever known. Nowadays, I have spent time talking, traveling, working on some projects with tons of friends from different culture backgrounds, as a result, I become more and more talkative, open and extroverted than I in the past. You can imagine an extroverted introvert living in me, controlling my thoughts and puzzling me from time to time. I feel lonely, not a bit lonely but extremely lonely for the decision I chose "take one year off school".

Every day I try not to surf the news feed on Facebook in order to avoid seeing something updated from my university friends. I do acknowledge they are having a busy, energetic life I always wish for and  taking a gap year is tough time for part of me occasionally because I need to get used to a new life that has no friends at the place I just moved to. Gap year is not blink world that you imagined. It is a new food with no reviews before for you to try how bad or good it is.

I have just got back home from Cambodia (Phnom Penh). These days, I do think travelling alone hasn't mesmerized me as it used to. I just want to travel with someone else who share good chemistry. That's all :)