Teach me how to love

Love is a learned behaviour. A person can't show what they don't know. You teach someone how to love you by what you allow. - Tony A. Gaskins Jr.-

I have spent time writing voraciously for 3 years now, which makes my life more complete than I had expected before. The thing has got tougher and tougher for me since I got down to writing my own work related to psychology and love. How can a girl who has never dated a guy before write about love? What if imagination gave her incredible support, at the very least her emotion for romance wasn't authentic and real. I am now put into this awkward situation.

A fellow countryman whom I met a month ago at a beach party left me some messages on Messenger asking me if I had a boyfriend. In my countryside, that a man asks you whether you are on a date seems to be normal, which can't be regarded as impolite or for a flirting reason. I replied him immediately "not yet". He encouraged me to fall in love with someone or feel free to crush a man before too late. "Too late" seemed to be a big deal here because I always think that sooner or later I will get married, settle down and give birth. Love can come suddenly, it is unpredictable. 

Last Thursday, I taught Vietnamese for an Australian man who has been in Vietnam for 7 months. He messaged me a couple weeks ago and this is the first time we have met each other. I started to help him handle some basic Vietnamese conversation related to daily activities and relationships. 

- Have you ever got married?

- Not yet. And you?

- I have been single for 20 years.

-Sorry, what?

- I mean I have been single for 20 years.

- So how old are you now?

- 20. 

- Oh. (He laughs)

Yes. I have never been on a date, even a short-term date with any guys before, which makes some people hear it for the first time feel stunned. I don't know how  to love and nobody has guided me to do that in a right way because I have never given them a chance to approach me, to discover me and to understand my soul. The bold gist here is I have never ever  given anyone a chance to love me. Have you ever read something related to "scared of love"?  My reason is I'm not ready for it. 

When am I ready to fall in love with someone? It is not a Yes/ No question and it makes the answer more complicated.